Old Menus - Fond Memories of Degustation

[Warning: This post contains graphic content.]

In a previous post, I talked about my experiences with the dorm food at ISU. But I've never related a particularly gory story regarding an unfortunate incident involving a dorm food menu, similar, in many respects, to this vintage Santa Fe Super Chief.

One day, ISU's dorm food supplier thought it prudent to add the caloric content next to each menu item on the bill of fare. This move inspired two of my dorm mates to enter into a grizzly food challenge: They would battle to see who could consume the most total calories in one sitting. By eating large portions of mashed potatoes and cream pie, it didn't take long for the winner's total to surpass 14,000 calories. Suffice to say, it's impossible to hold down this much savory goodness. The winner dashed upstairs to unload his winning cargo in one of the six sinks we all shared on the 15th floor of ISU's Manchester Hall. The janitor, bless his heart, refused to clean up the mess. (Nor would anyone else for that matter.)

This left one of the sinks hopelessly clogged and in deplorable condition.

As luck would have it, I found myself over the ill-fated sink one morning, a few weeks later, trying to brush my teeth. And, clumsy me, I dropped my toothbrush right into what was by then a gruesome scene. Thinking quickly, I grabbed the toothbrush and rushed back to my room to boil water for the sterilization of my dirty instrument. After a few minutes in a rolling boil, I removed the sterilized toothbrush and resumed brushing. In my haste, it didn't occur to me--until too late--that the hot water had caused the plastic surrounding the bristles to expand. I quickly found myself with a mouth full of very disgusting toothbrush bristles--whilst standing over a sink filled with weeks-old sick.

It was a low point.