I remember my first job interview. Technically, a few months shy of 16, I was too young to legally work; however, my dad, ever eager to see his first chick leave the nest, pointed out that age (or legality) never stopped an enterprising Chicagoan from working. So, I applied at McDonald's
. My dad made me wear a suit and tie to the interview.
They put me on the night shift, behind the grill.
During the interview, the fact that I'd never prepared food of any kind hadn't come up. The first meal I'd ever made was as a "professional" cook. I pity the fool who ate that first Quarter Pounder...or subsequent burgers, produced during my brief, but memorable, tenure behind the hot, flat griddle. Suffice to say, some people weren't Lovin' It.
Eventually, the manager felt my talents would better serve the organization if I were assigned maintenance duties. So, he took the spatula out of my hands and put a mop in its place.
Unfortunately, I'd never mopped, either. I'd swept. I'd vacuumed. But I had never mopped. The concept of "wringing out" a mop was completely foreign to me at 15. Being a young go-getter, however, I took to mopping to the best of my limited knowledge and ability. As it happened, unbeknownst to me, the owner of the franchise, a fedora-wearing gentleman with reported ties to Chicago's most infamous industry, was seated in the first booth that I endeavored to swab out. I dragged the soaking, dripping mop across his wing-tipped feet. To the horror of the manager, The Man stood up, put his arm firmly around my neck, and whispered in my ear (and I'll never forget what he said), "Son, that's no way to mop. You've got wring it out before you drag it across the floor." A light went off in my head. Ah, ha! I knew there had to be a "trick" to it.
When I returned to the counter, the manager, who had been watching the proceedings in horror, asked me, "What did that gentleman say to you?"
"Oh, you mean Uncle Tony…" I replied, without missing a beat.
At 15, I might not have been much of a cook or janitor, but, based on the look of that manager's face, I knew I had a bright future ahead as a writer.
[Image by dipfan]
